Follow these easy
13 14 15 steps to enter!
Follow these easy
1) Follow my blog publicly. And passionately. This is important. I have to believe you mean it for your entry to qualify. I mean I am doing this for you, to make you happy. That's gotta mean something, right?
2) Find three complete strangers and get them to follow my blog publicly. The use of force is authorized.
3) Create ten new blogs to follow me publicly. Bonus entry: don't use the word "cat" in any of them.
4) Create a post extolling the virtues of following me citing evidence of miraculous healings, lottery wins, and finding extra prizes in cereal boxes.
5) Follow me on Twitter and laugh at all my jokes. I will too know whether or not you actually laugh. Yes I will. Just do it.
6) Make MySpace more popular than Facebook. Make me the new Tila Tequila.
7) Explain to me how MySpace is supposed to work. I never did figure that out, and they've probably changed it.
8) A card would be nice. It doesn't have to be my birthday or any special occasion or anything. Just something nice in the mail. I'm just saying.
9) Brush my teeth. Make sure you get behind the back ones - that area is too often neglected.
10) Stop using captcha codes. Do that whether or not you want to win anything. Do that to avoid being yelled at by a lot of people often. I did, and it improved my life immeasurably.
11) Do everything else I do too. And don't question it first. That goes against the spirit of blind compliance, and takes the fun right out of it. If you're going to be like that about it don't even bother. Geez.
12) Comment on this entry. I know, you're thinking I shouldn't have to tell people that, but I'm telling you, if I don't say it weeks from now somebody's going to come crying that they didn't win and I'm going to be all "well you didn't enter" and they're going to be all "well I assumed" and I'll be all "well c'mon, what am I supposed to do with that?" but they'll already be pissed and there's just no reasoning with people at that point, is there?
13) Comment on this entry again. Dammit, I just know somebody's going to screw this up and it's going to come flying back on me even though I've made it perfectly clear. You don't comment, you don't win. Got it? So do it twice, and that way... oh hell. I don't even know why I bother. I really don't.
Don't delay! Lucky winners will receive
14) Secure a sponsor to provide a prize for the contest.