- That loaf of bread from the grocery store contains more than your minimum daily requirement of deer poop.
- That well water does not dissolve teeth. Apparently that's "normal grit" and not the shaved enamel of my molars.
- The Hutterites' preferred method of arm removal.
- The further away the convenience store, the greater the craving for junk food. Even if you never bought the stuff when it was within walking distance.
- The full, profound extent of my dog's love of poo.
- If you don't know the weather forcast, you aren't capable of having a conversation with anybody.
- If you don't go at least 60 miles per hour on the wet gravel road the guy behind you will, like, literally die, like, right now and really really painfully, too. You bitch.
- If he's in front of you 10 miles per hour is plenty fast enough for both of you. I mean what's your big hurry anyway, hot shot?
- It gets dark when the sun goes down.
- Cows like strawberries.
- Cows like yoghurt.
- If you offer a cow strawberry yoghurt it will look at you like you're the antichrist and run to the opposite end of the pasture, pooping frantically.
- That a lot of things in life involve poop.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
You'd think I'd have picked up a few new ideas for titles while I was at it.
Things I Have Learned Living a Month in the Country:
- ▼ September (5)