Wednesday, August 4, 2010

I'm thinking of firing the elf who writes my titles.

There are a lot of people who don't believe in the power of crystals. They don't think "a hunk of rock" can manifest a human desire. I think implicit in that form of detraction, however, is evidence that most people don't properly understand how to access the manifesting power of crystals.

Yes, crystals are inert. Change happens when things interact. To access the power of crystals to manifest things you have to use your power to change the state of the crystals.

Say I want to manifest something. Let's say something simple, like a glass of iced tea. I go and get my crystals - I have a whole container of them - and select a few for the process. How many I use depends on the results I want. Whether, for example, I want to manifest ice tea only for myself or if I want other friends and loved ones to benefit from the manifestation. I then take these crystals, transfer them to an appropriate receptacle, and change their state.

I'm not talking about any kind of elaborate ritual or extreme force or anything like that. I'm talking something as simple as putting them in water. Allowing the elements to mingle and merge. That's my entire job. The crystals - and the water, the contribution of that element should not be dismissed - do the rest, and literally almost instantly, I have my iced tea.

Now maybe this fantastical process is beyond the ability of our rudimentary little monkey brains to understand scientifically. Perhaps we never will completely understand how it is that crystals are capable of manifesting our desires, but can you argue the results when, to use our example, they consistently manifest ice tea every single time you use them for that purpose?

Granted, so far ice tea is the only thing I've had success using them to manifest, but then I buy all my crystals at the grocery store. I'm sure if you went to a proper crystal store you'd find ones you could add water to and get, like, ponies and sports cars and stuff.

48 comments:

Bright Circle said...

If you mix ice crystals, sugar crystals and chemical flavoring crystals you can get all KINDS of desires made manifest! I gotta manifest some iced tea with twice the amount of crystals called for on the canister right now.

Unknown said...

Loved, loved that!

HalfAsstic.com said...

I am just about to partake of the enchilada crystals that Kes just took out of the oven...
;-)

blog with no name said...

How can we be so sure it's the crystals at all? Maybe it's a magic jug...
Careful about firing your elf... The elves local union rep. might come by and do extensive damage to your base boards and electrical out lets...
Maybe just get a crystal elf...

Krimmyk said...

Send the elf who writes your titles to me, I need a minion to do laundry and dishes. :-)

TheFrogBag said...

All I can say is: Bwahahaha!!

Brian Miller said...

mine makes koolaid...lol

Deanna said...

Don't fire the elf - you'd only have to pay unemployment...

I couldn't help thinking about crystals that I could sprinkle on hubby to help him get a clue... hmmmm probably not.

Enjoyed this post as always.

Cindy said...

Wonderful post, glad you are well, who is this elf your talking about anyway. lol. hugs.

nick said...

I tried putting some crystals in my magic aura niche and asking for a crock of gold. I must have said something wrong because all I got was a stale cheeseburger.

BLOGitse said...

I didn't know that's the way to get ponies and stuff.
We learn a lot by blogging - like this. Thanks for sharing! LOL! :)

One Photo said...

Oh I love it! You can keep the ponies but let me know when you find the magic crystals that can conjure up a day of quiet time or whisk me away to some idyllic retreat.

Unknown said...

Fanatstic imagination!

Jazz said...

I want a pony. And stuff.

nitebyrd said...

I've got some crystals that make coffee. Now all I need are some that make money!

MAB from OtterCatHaus said...

Tatty, I heart you.
That is all.

Mike said...

I use Crystal Light sometimes. I particularly like the lemonade! LOL!

Kate said...

Have you found any 'botox/facelift' crystals yet? Let me know when you do. kthanx.
Great post.

mythopolis said...

I think you have to select your crystals wisely. Some guys in the news the other day were dissolving some crystal meth, and lo and behold, it manifested a drug enforcement raid, which in turn, manifested handcuffs, and a jail cell!

Juli Cannon said...

Hey StirGirl,
Check out my blog today.
I have left you something NESTEA~

Joey Lynn Resciniti said...

I use the stuff that's in a little baggie. I think it's a leaf. Do you think leaves possess this power too?

linlah said...

I want the kind of crystals your having, mine just dance on the walls when the sun hits them.

Felicity Grace Terry said...

Fascinating, just fascinating. I love crystals, looking at them they seem to speak at me.

Claudya Martinez said...

You are so wise and practical.

Jocelyn said...

These crystals also dissolve with simple saliva and interact arrestingly with coffee. In my lab, sometimes 12 crystals must be stirred in to a cup to do their magic.

Jenners said...

Wait. .. you're talking about sugar here, right?

Shrinky said...

crystals are all fine and well, but you should see what a magnet can do!

Send me a picture of your elf on, I'll see if one of the fairies over here can use him..

Traci said...

I have also had crystals successfully turn water into lemonade and milk into chocolate and strawberry.

I personally believe in the power of said crystals.

:-)

Nessa said...

Isn't physics wonderful?

I wonder if tea bags would work? I'm not sure because I get them at the metaphysical bookstore down the street.

carma said...

I like how your mind works. Wishing mine was as complex ;-)

RA said...

I would hire your elf, if he/she could help me to come up with interesting thoughts like this. My brain must be stuck somewhere. Do you have by any chance crystals that might help me to lift up the mind's imagination. Love it.

Erika said...

Ha! Are you sure that your crystals aren't actually small powder packets labeled Crystal Light.....Those are the powerful crystals I use to make lemonade.

Anonymous said...

Sack that friggin elf. They're damn useless, you can have mine if you want!

secret agent woman said...

But what about pyramids? I'm sure you need to work them in somehow.

injaynesworld said...

Pony crystals! If only I'd known that as a child. I sooo wanted a pony.

You are one clever girl, my friend.

Nezzy (Cow Patty Surprise) said...

Heeehehehhe! You crack me up girl!

I just used a little crystal on my peach.

I've been fightin' dang shingles since Memorial Day, sick---I've been sick baby! I'm tryin' to catch up on my blogs....I may be doin' the imposable but I am Nezzy!!! :o)

God bless ya and have a glorious day sweetie!!!

Buckeroomama said...

You are always such a fun and quirky read!! :)

mythopolis said...

To believe in anything is alchemy.

Nick said...

Whither Tattytiara?

Vicki Lane said...

Magical! But I prefer the herbal approach for my tea.

Could I interest you in some instant H2O? Just add water...

natalee said...

lol!! MMMMMM ... I love crysals too unfortunately that trait passed to my kids and the dentist bill is through the roof....LOL!! Love this!!!

Joann Mannix said...

If you find any magical powers for the crystals besides chilling the iced tea, let me know, I was getting all excited there and I was thinking, I'm going to have her use her crystal powers to get my book published! Either that or get the crystals to send a dark chocolate brownie my way. I like magic that gives me chocolate.

I'm going to go now and drink some magic crystals that live in the wine.

Joann Mannix said...

If you find any magical powers for the crystals besides chilling the iced tea, let me know, I was getting all excited there and I was thinking, I'm going to have her use her crystal powers to get my book published! Either that or get the crystals to send a dark chocolate brownie my way. I like magic that gives me chocolate.

I'm going to go now and drink some magic crystals that live in the wine.

Sandra said...

I could use a new minivan...or at least someone to clean the one I have...where can I find me the necessary crystals for that?...
Brilliant!

Shrinky said...

Hey Tatty, just popped over to say hi!

michael said...

Do the crystals have anything to do with the elf? I could use help with titles sometimes.

Anonymous said...

My magic crystals make coffee. I love coffee.

StarTraci said...

Hi! It's been crazy and I haven't stopped by in a while. I see you haven't posted recently -- I hope all is well.

This is my new blog identity since that pesky birthday finally crept up on me.

Have a great week.

:-)
Traci
(formerly 38Traci)

P.S. I'm number 200! Yay!


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