Scale of one to ten, how badly do I want pizza?
1 - eh, pizza, oatmeal, what's the difference?
2 - they aren't giving me one free, they're charging me for two no matter how many I order!
3 - if I pour ketchup on my mac n cheese and throw some bologna on top it'll be like a pepperoni pizza I can eat with a spoon! Kind of!
4 - not sure I'm down with the whole putting on pants to open the door thing.
5 - pizza's always good. Because it's pizza.
6 - pardon me, I don't usually drool. You were saying something about pizza?
7 - I can probably find enough change in the couch to pay for it
8 - I can probably find enough change in the neighbor's couch to pay for it - you distract them.
9 - would it be less creepy to run out and meet the delivery person at their car if I'm not cry-laughing and screaming "Thank You!" when I do it?
10 - not having pizza isn't a real option, is it?
1 hour ago